A Note from Arlene

Arlene Harder

Welcome to the Support4Change Blog!

I have had a continuous online presence for more than sixteen years with four websites, the last of which was Support4Change. Now I am in the process of bringing many of my previous articles here to my blog.

If you would like to learn more about me, please visit my bio page. If you would like to subscribe to my newsletter, you can do so here.

 

Diversion Number 30: Perfect Exercise for People Over 60

Diversions for You and Your Friends is a feature of the blog, which appears every Monday. To find out more about Diversionsread the Introduction and Number 1, or you can visit the Diversions Archive.

Looking for fool-proof way to exercise? Since I’m over 60 (significantly over), I found this method outstanding.

If you aren’t yet 60, just think what you can look toward as you continue to take care of your body. And if you the kind of person who likes to give advice, you might suggest this to those who need to build more muscle strength. Read More

Forgiving Yourself and Others — Not just “forgiving”

This article originally appeared on the Support4Change website, and is reposted here.

Learn how to forgive both yourself and others with a technique that recognizes we all do the best we can and that we can’t control the behavior of others.

ReconciliationThere is a great deal of confusion about what it means to forgive and about how to do it. Hopefully these ideas, which over the years I have discovered work best for my clients and for myself, will also be valuable for you.

What does it mean to forgive?

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Diversion Number 29: 20 Incredible Stairways

Diversions for You and Your Friends is a feature of the blog, which appears every Monday. To find out more about Diversionsread the Introduction and Number 1, or you can visit the Diversions Archive.

My reaction to the staircase diversion pictures I bring you today is quite different than it would have been forty years ago. Then I was still able to hike in the mountains and climb stairs without much effort. Then I could imagine myself climbing up many, but not all, of the spectacular stairs in the pictures below.

That isn’t the case any more. I now use a cane and a walker! But I can still admire the engineering of stairs both in the wild and spectacular outside and inside beautiful buildings.

Which one would you most like to climb, if you still could? While there are several that are most impressive for the natural setting in which they are built, I would like number 17, the steps on 16th Avenue in the Golden Gate Heights neighborhood of San Francisco with its massive mosaic.

29-1 lello portugal
1. Staircase at Lello Bookshop Portugal – This interesting grand staircase in Lello Bookshop in Portugal stands ominous and heavy. The steps are like two channels pouring and swirling to a single point. The side view gives you a closer idea of the immense curves and giddy sinking feeling of each step.

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Diversion Number 28: All Aboard America’s Only Floating ZIP Code

Diversions for You and Your Friends is a feature of the blog, which appears every Monday. To find out more about Diversionsread the Introduction and Number 1, or you can visit the Diversions Archive.

A few weeks ago I introduced you to the Great Big Story website, which was the source for the “Slow TV” piece. What I like most about these videos is that the stories they tell are well done and most take less than 5 minutes.

In the Frontiers series on that website they say they have: Read More

The Magic in Your Differences

 

This article originally appeared on the Support4Change website, and is reposted here.

The following is the first chapter of The New Intimacy by Judith Sherven, Ph.D. and James Sniechowski, Ph.D., and reprinted with permission. You will find other articles by this husband-and-wife therapist team here, on the Support4Change Blog.

rough diamond

The Promise of Differences

Everything that happens to you is your teacher. The secret is to learn to sit at the feet of your own life and be taught by it.      — Polly Berrien Berends

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As we learn to truly respect one another’s differences, the much sought after ideal — loving partnership that fosters emotional and spiritual growth — is becoming a reality.      — Art Klein

Did your relationship start out with great promise, filled with excitement, throbbing with life? Were you certain the two of you would create a vital and passionate future together? Did you see in your lover all the qualities you wanted, so that just the thought of being together was enough to fire your desire and make your skin tingle? Did you imagine your family with beautiful, loving children and two caring and protective parents all together in a warm and comfortable home? And as you imagined growing old together, did you see yourself sitting back, content and confident, knowing, “We lived and loved and we did well!” Read More