Does Perfectionism Affect Your Relationships?

sun with question markPART ONE

Exploring Your Personality # 9:

Perfectionism

ASK YOURSELF THESE QUESTIONS:

Do I have the sense that others want me to achieve something well even if they don’t say it? Why do I feel that way?

Am I impatient with my own errors and notice that images of past failures plague me? How do I keep reminding myself of what I haven’t done well enough?

Do others tell me that I set my standards too high for anyone to reach? What do they say?

If someone makes a comment about a topic of which I know something, do I feel I have to make certain they know that I, too, know about it? If so, when was the last time I did this?

How do my answers shed light on my relationship with someone with whom I have a strained or broken relationship?

SPECIAL NOTE: I’ve often written about perfectionism and you may want to check out the articles on Support4Change on the subject: Lessons of a Recovering Perfectionist.

These questions complement the Better Tomorrows Program for healing strained and broken relationships and are part of the blog’s series of questions for exploring who you are.

To explore other questions, see Ask Yourself Questions and Change Your Life, Healing Relationships is an Inside Job, and the Q-and-A Club.

blue-green line

PART TWO

Ecuador and Peru Travel Report # 10:

How to Clean Your Tennis Shoes

Dragon Hill

Our first walk on the Galapagos tour was here on Santa Cruz Island, where we saw flamingos and iguanas and heard finches and mocking birds. They said we should bring “good walking shoes, water, sun block, sunglasses, hat, insect repellent.” I had all those plus my walking sticks. But as we began the hike we had to pass through a place where the tide pulled water across our path and we got our shoes wet. This caused my shoes to collect brown dust and by the end of the afternoon my shoes, which had looked so nice when I started out, and which had to last me for three more weeks, were brown.

Oh well, I thought, if I can’t enjoy my vacation because my shoes don’t look fresh, I need to reorder my priorities.

But guess what? By the time we’d gone on another hike, the shoes were clean again, probably better looking than they had been when we began the trip! My theory is that the phosphorous from the guana left by the iguanas and birds were absorbed by my shoes and acted like a strong laundry detergent. My shoes still look relatively good despite the fact I wore them every day.

One thought on “Does Perfectionism Affect Your Relationships?

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