Perfectionist Personality Self-test

Want to know if you are a member of the Practicing Perfectionist Society?

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Take the test below to see whether you believe you have to do a “perfect” job in almost everything you do, even though it often isn’t required. Designed by a recovering perfectionist, these questions can give you a perspective on the topic you may not have had.

As you ask yourself the following questions, pay particular attention to the “why” of your answer.

  • Do I like to prove my value as a person by showing others I am totally competent at some task? [yes/no]

Why? Read More

What Spouses or Partners of Perfectionists Need to Know

December 17, 2012
Are you married to a perfectionist – or considering marriage to a perfectionist? This book may be the very help you need.

This post is an experiment. Read on to learn why.

How to Live with a Perfectionist Without Going CrazyThere are many theories on how long a sales page needs to be in order to be effective.  I’ve tried all lengths and have gotten mixed results on all of them.

I have discussed this for years with my webmaster, Renee, creator of a book blog, so she knows a bit about books. We have come to the conclusion that the length of a sales page depends on several things.

One, if you are introducing a new product or program that people have not heard about, it makes sense to give them enough information so they will know whether they might be interested.

Two, if you have improved a product or program that has been around for awhile, you may need to explain why it is better.

Three, if you are selling a book, there are only several things the reader wants to know:

1. Is the topic of interest to me?

2. Does the author have experience in that area?

3. What is the price?

4. How easy is it to purchase the book?

5. What do other people say about the book? *

Since today I am doing an initial launch of How to Love a Perfectionist Without Going Crazy, I’ve decided to go with the short version of the sales-page-length controversy. In fact, since it isn’t terribly long, I am including the entire sales page in this blog post. It is not something I have done with some of my other books, so this can be a trial.

What you’ll read below covers the five points above. It doesn’t cover Number 5, testimonials, because this is a very new book. But for the first five people who buy the book and give me a testimonial, I will send them a link to the digital version of Ask Yourself Questions and Change Your Life or Healing Relationships is an Inside Job.

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Is Your Relationship to a Perfectionist Driving You Crazy?

As a “recovering perfectionist” I have written a great deal on perfectionism for perfectionists. Now I have written an ebook for the person who lives with, or loves, a perfectionist.

I hope that it will help you help your spouse — or other close relative or friend — become a recovering perfectionist more quickly than I was able to do. 

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Are you married to a perfectionist – or considering marriage to a perfectionist?

Does that person ask you to do more and meet higher standards than are really necessary?

Is your relationship failing because you are tired of being the cheerleader of someone with impossibly high goals and low self-esteem?

Do you feel you always have to give in in order to keep the peace?

Do you have a relative or friend who is struggling in a relationship with a perfectionist?

In this ebook you will discover:

❖  How the author became a recovering perfectionist

❖  How to know whether your partner is a perfectionist

❖  How to help him become a recovering perfectionist

❖  How to instill high standards in your child without
creating a perfectionist

Are you ready to turn around your relationship with a perfectionist?

If you are, this is the book for you.

Here are the details of how you can purchase it:

Go to the How to Love a Perfectionist Without Going Crazy page on Support4Change and learn how to live with—and love—a perfectionist without needing to go crazy in the process.

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A View of Perfectionism From “a Ole Farm Boy”

September 27, 2012
Perfectionists come from all walks of life. Here is an “Ole Farm Boy’s” perspective.

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A ”Fond Farewell” Article

When I changed Support4Change to a new format, I needed to delete some articles that didn’t fit in the new site but were too good to completely throw away. So I have moved many of them here to the blog, where they will still be available and people can find them by using tags. Enjoy.

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A View of Perfectionism From “a Ole Farm Boy”

BY RONNIE MAEKER

FarmI am just a ole farm boy that ran across your site. These are some of my thoughts. I actually was self-evaluating and unfortunately share some characteristics with perfectionist. I wish sometimes I could be surrounded by mirrors so that I could be made aware of how I am perceived by others from all directions. These are some definitions I came up with thinking about different situations: personal, work, parental, marriage,etc. If they sound like they came from Gomer Pyle it is because they came from someone like him in certain respects. Enjoy…………or not

Perfection:

A goal that is bought and paid for by mistakes; the goal set by people that is only attainable when the purchase price has been satisfied.

In reality: a point that is (fictionally) reached when someone thinks the outcome can no longer be improved (self-perceived). This point reached has not been established by anyone other than the person making the observation that the point has been reached. The idea that there is a point and place in time when no further improvements can be made (self-destructive). A false belief.

A myth.

Someone’s belief that the works, deeds, actions, words, and ideas of others can’t approach the high level of completeness of our own.

A method (means) to madness (end).

An belief that the results justify the actions taken to obtain the desired results.

A level of completeness that is viewed at different levels by various people. Mistakes that are not made after mistakes have been made. A highly desirable, completely unreachable place.

A place reserved for GOD.

A Nirvana that is sought after while driving personal contacts, of those seeking it, crazy. A dynamic goal sought after by many and achieved by none.

© Copyright 2007, Ronnie Maeker

RONNIE MAEKER’S BACKGROUND
You have permission to use my name and background if you like. I think that as we move from what once was a rural (agriculture) based economy to where we are now and where we are heading, some values, traditions, critical thinking, problem solving, and other talents and beliefs have gotten reduced to outdated thinking modes. My thinking is that could not be farther from the truth. As we move farther from the foundation of the founding fathers of the U.S., the more our society degrades. We continue to try to put BandAids on gunshot wounds. We have shot ourselves in the foot and continue upward at a steady pace.

Just a little more information about myself. Grew up on a farm. Diesel mechanic by trade. Farmer, owned auto parts store, and am now enrolled in Radiography Technology at South Plains College in Lubbock, Tx. This is the next step in my continuing education. My goal is to at the least have a Master’s degree……………in something.

 Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons
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What is This World Coming To?

September 20, 2012
Does everything in life need to be controlled?

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A ”Fond Farewell” Article

When I changed Support4Change to a new format, I needed to delete some articles that didn’t fit in the new site but were too good to completely throw away. So I have moved many of them here to the blog, where they will still be available and people can find them by using tags. Enjoy.

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WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?

Around Halloween last year I got an email from my sister. She wrote:

Hi siblings —

Jack-o-lantern

Yesterday I set out to buy some bittersweet. My previous supply lasted years, and so I stopped at Windmill Market which used to have such items for sale — not much of that type and no bittersweet.

When I was at Michael’s craft store, I checked their bittersweet, but it was so obviously phony that I didn’t buy it. However — while there – I saw the oddest item.

There was a bin labeled “Carvable Pumpkins” and a woman buying several of them. She was explaining to her children, as we stood in the checkout line, that they could carve faces on them – but no mess with the pumpkins getting soft and squishy in a couple weeks.

Here I thought that part of the deal. Evidently life can be controllable??

Some things just aren’t the same anymore.

— Your sis,

P.S. Today I drove by Groby’s garden store and was able to buy real bittersweet cuttings.

 

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What Advice Would You Give a Perfectionist?

August 10, 2011
If you are a perfectionist who is tired of feeling you always have to give 110% to whatever you do (or know of someone like that), what advice would work best for you?

You are invited to come along on my vacation that begins today:

Today we are driving up to San Francisco to meet our grandson . . . who is being driven by our son from Fortuna (northern California) down to my brother-in-law’s in Palo Alto . . . where we’ll leave our car while we fly together to Boston . . . rent a car and drive to Lexington, Massachusetts, where my daughter lives . . . walk around historical sites for a couple days . . . drive for three hours up to Boothbay Harbor, Maine, for an Elderhostel (now Road Scholar) Intergenerational program on sailing . . . enjoy five days learning to sail . . . drive back to Boston (it’s cheaper that way than flying out of Maine) . . . fly back to San Francisco . . . pick up our car and drive to northern California to return our grandson . . . visit a few other family members there . . . and drive home!

During this sojourn I have pre-scheduled three posts a week while I’m gone so that when you come here while I’m driving, flying, walking, driving, sailing, driving, flying, and driving again, you’ll find something here that may interest you.

Of course, if you are on vacation, I rather hope you don’t bother visiting here. You need to enjoy wherever you have gone, and the blog will be here when you return.

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Include Your Suggestions in an Ebook for Perfectionists

In my last newsletter I said that I plan to put together an e-book for perfectionists (and those who live with them). I thought it would be a good idea to have a compilation of advice on the subject besides my “Lessons of a Recovering Perfectionist.”

So whether or not you are a perfectionist, I invite you to tell me:

  • Your definition of perfectionism.
  • The best advice you would give someone who is a perfectionist.
  • If you are a perfectionist, the best advice you’ve been given and whether you’ve taken that advice.AND, if you have a story, funny or otherwise, include that as well.

I will not use your name, or initials, unless you give me permission. But I will include your advice in the book. I won’t tell you when I expect to publish it, for that would only play into the hands of my own perfectionist, who thinks she can manage my time with a zillion projects and get them all done according to her optimistic schedule.

If you have any friends who have been able to go from practicing to recovering perfectionist, please share this project with them. I would love to know what it is that has helped others overcome the pressure to do better than one needs to do, or perhaps even can do.

To fill out the form, click on this link: Perfectionism Survey.

Since I wrote the newsletter, I’ve decided that anyone who fills out the perfectionism survey would be entered into a raffle for a print book of Ask Yourself Questions and Change Your Life.  If you win, I will contact you for your address.

Thanks for giving me information on perfectionism. I can use all the help I can get.

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