Forgiving Yourself and Others — Not just “forgiving”

This article originally appeared on the Support4Change website, and is reposted here.

Learn how to forgive both yourself and others with a technique that recognizes we all do the best we can and that we can’t control the behavior of others.

ReconciliationThere is a great deal of confusion about what it means to forgive and about how to do it. Hopefully these ideas, which over the years I have discovered work best for my clients and for myself, will also be valuable for you.

What does it mean to forgive?

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Diversion Number 24: Old Gas Stations! Old Cars! Wow!

Diversions for You and Your Friends is a feature of the blog, which appears every Monday. To find out more about Diversionsread the Introduction and Number 1, or you can visit the Diversions Archive.

Today’s diversion was sent to me by my sister. It included more than twice as many pictures as I have in this post. The ten I’ve chosen should be enough to help you return to the days when cars and gas stations were a bit different than they are today. In fact, some of these pictures may seem to come from another planet, especially if you are much younger than I.

The pictures I’ve chosen may tickle your fancy with registered restrooms, free hot dogs and drinks, and prices that hadn’t yet reached a dollar a gallon. Of course, to be fair, the average salary was a great deal lower then than it is today.

When I think about the changes in gas stations since these pictures were taken, how much of a change will there be in the next fifty years? Certainly there will be more electric plugs than gasoline pumps. And maybe by that time designers will have created better batteries, so a car can go much farther without recharging.

Incidentally, the pictures that came with the original email didn’t have comments, but I couldn’t resist adding my two-cents worth. So if you see an incorrect statement, blame me.

Goodyear - 1920s or 30s

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You Need Both Sides of Your Brain

This article originally appeared on the Support4Change website, and is reposted here.

Because both sides of our brains are used for different purposes, it is  important to recognize how to use them separately and together.

left-brain-right-brainOne summer day in the historic Chautauqua grounds in Upstate New York, I sat in the audience listening to a lecture on the brain. The speaker identified the corpus callosum as the longitudinal fissure connecting the left and right cerebral hemispheres. She said that the female has a 20% larger corpus callosum than males, allowing them to see relationships between ideas better than men. The women in the crowd laughed and applauded. We’ve always known our minds worked differently than men’s. Read More

Understanding The Parenting Game

This article originally appeared on the Support4Change website, and is reposted here.

Now the thing about having a baby — and I can’t be the first person to have noticed this — is that thereafter you have it.        — Jean Kerr, “Please Don’t Eat the Daisies,” 1957

Dice - 1-2-4-5-6.jpg
Guess what? You’ve been enrolled in the “Parenting Game.” In fact, everyone who chooses the immense responsibility of bringing a new life into this uncertain complex world, whether through birth or adoption, is automatically enrolled, even if you don’t know the rules.

It is your responsibility as coach of this amazing game to maneuver, with love and minimum error, a small but rapidly growing human through a series of increasingly complex mazes—a process that often continues into young adulthood. When the game is over, the child will, hopefully, be an emotionally secure, resourceful, resilient, compassionate human being, prepared to contribute to society in a positive way. Read More